Question:

I am having engagement with my first cousin recently. I wish to marry her with complete Islamic rules and regulations. Let me know briefly what exactly are the Islamic teachings on wedding. I am asking this because it is customary in our families that when a marriage is decided, both sides try to make more and more arrangements. So let me know the details of things or materials which can I receive or not in the shape of dowry from girl side and also what amount of Mehr is enough from boy sides.

Further what is the Islamic position on dances in the shape of Bhangra also made by girls & boys separately and collectively.

I have another question. Is marriage right. if one of couple is regular prayer & other is non. What Islam says on such marriages? Your answer is urgently required !

Rana Imran
Pakistan

Aanswer:

Assalam-o-Alaikum and thank you for contacting JI dear Rana Imran!

We are happy to note that you intended to observe in your marriage, only what was allowed in Islam. We wish and pray you succeed and set an example for others to follow:

1. The free acceptance (Eijab and Qabool) by the spouses, and the settlement of Mahr’ between the bride (through her valie) and the groom, are the basic conditions of Nikah. It is bride’s prerogative to ask as much mahr as she wished. Advisably she should not ask more than what the husband can easily and happily pay.
2. Nikah ceremony should be held in public - known to the community - and properly verified by witnesses on both sides;
3. Walimah is the Sunnah of the Prophet (Sall Allah o alaihe wa Sallam), but must be within your means and as simple as possible. Let the marriage be an occasion of hapiness and social get together for relatives and friends, but no mixed dancing or bhangras;
4. While mahr is a must (unless absolved by the wife-to-be) and has to be paid by the husband before marriage consummation, or as mutually decided in the nikah contract, Jahaiz is NOT to be demanded by the groom at all. If the bride’s father/brothers give her something, it remains her sole property for all time, along with what she has inherited or earned through her own efforts. Husband will never make any claim on what belongs to the wife - exception to some legal conditions in case of khula’, if ever it comes to.

That is what makes an Islamic marriage and a family union that pleases Allah. The rest are customs, mostly self-styled, having no roots in religious injunctions and practices, and better be avoided.

5. Concerning your question about some non praying person, the marriage will be legally alright if one partner was sluggish or non-practicing, as long as he/she confessed faith in Islam. However, the observing partner should continuously preach, in loving manner, to win back the partner to practice.

Wassalam,

M. Haq

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